10. Barely enough time to get the Halloween décor down before Christmas
9. Turkey takes too damn long to defrost & cook
8. Cranberries? Aren’t they grown in a bog?
7. Start the Christmas shopping season on Halloween, it’s good for the economy.
6. Night Crew
5. Do we really need two end-of-the-year holidays where we make gluttony an art form?
4. What was the deal with Pocahontas anyway?
3. Buckles on hats are Satanic.
2. Does anyone really know what giblets are?
1. Pumpkin pies do not resemble pumpkins in any way. Just what are they trying to pull?
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